Trying to Hook Up While on the Bus

After my excursion to the Bronx Zoo, I catch the Bx39 to go home. The bus was unusually full and after making my way to the back, I walk into the motions of a modern day Don Juan trying to hook up with a young lady. Here is how it went.

The dude started yapping away that he could guess her age. Bad enough he tried that tact, which by the way never leads to anything positive, he was way off on her age. About 10 years too many. He said she was 30 when she was actually 20. Figuring the young lady would like an older man, he told her he was 32. He actually looked closer to 40. I can say that since I check ID's and I have a better sense of guessing ages. But I digress. She told him that she wasn't interested in dating an older guy and he continue to persist dropping the line "Age doesn't matter" and "It's only a number". Each time she heard a line, she'd roll her eyes in my direction. I just tried my hardest not to laugh. He was oblivious at the fact that she was not interested.

I'll give it to him, as dead as a doorknob as he was he just kept on going. He told her that he wanted to get to know her better and to prove that he was sincere, she could ask him anything she wanted. The girl was trying to be polite but a sly smile came across her face. This woman may have been young but she knew what she was doing.

First she asked him if he had kids. He stalled then answered yes. She shot back she's not interesting in being involved with someone that has kids.

Secondly she asked him if he had a job which he answered "Does that matter?". Nope, no job she says. LOL. He responds by saying "Why do I need a job to rap to a female." The balls on this guy. She told him that she won't waste any time with a person who doesn't have a job or isn't interesting in bettering themselves. Bravo!!!!!

Third, she asked if he was involved with anyone and he responded that he just broke up badly. She flips it around and asks him "How do you know you're ready for another relationship of your last one just ended badly" LOL. The dude just stood there not knowing what to say next. Boom!!!! He was flabbergasted as she got up and exited the bus.

Pilot to bombardier, pilot to bombardier, I'm hit..I'm hit...I'm going down...may-day, may-day...The dude crashed burned. Hahahahahaha.

FH

Sisco's Snow Adventure December 2010

For all of you out there in the NYC tri-state area who were hoping for a white Christmas, you're wish almost came true. The cold white stuff came en-masse the day after and it is here to stay for a while. 

Starting during the morning of the 26th and mercifully coming to an end sometime during the early part of the 27th, NYC received over a foot and a half of snow. Guess who was on the move during the festivities. Yup, yours truly, the humble narrator. See, as a bar worker for a bar that NEVER closes, there's really no snow days. Sure, I could have called out but why should I lose out on making money. In my line of work, no work=no pay. So in the middle of the storm I bundled up and went on my merry way. As you can see in the video that follows this paragraph my trip down was a bit intense but somewhat manageable. Heck, I got downtown in such a speedy fashion that I was able to make a detour at Best Buy in Union Square. For the record, the place was busy...and the economy is bad, but I digress. 



Throughout the night we were visited by many poor souls who for one reason or another were thrust outside in the snow and came to our oasis-like doors for some warmth and nourishment of the liquid kind. In and out they came and the snow continued to fall at a steady pace. As the hours ticked on by, Mike and I wondered how bad our respective commutes would be. He was going to the Upper West Side while those of you who have read this blog before know that I live in the Bronx, over a mile from the subway. That little tidbit will loom large later on. As you will see from the next video, getting downstairs to get the train would prove to be hazardous to the most hardiest of souls. Lo and behold, I made it down unscathed and was told by a mysterious oracle that my very moves were being watched. Interesting indeed.



As I mentioned in the last video, my ride on my favorite Philly Iron Horse #6 would indeed be the proverbial quiet before the storm. Having arrived at the Morrison-Soundview Station at 4:57am, I figured that I could catch either the Bx27 or the Bx4 buses. To my surprise, Lady Fate threw me a curveball. There were no buses. AT ALL. To make matters worse, there were no cabs to be seen. So after 25 minutes I gave up hope of relying on automotive transportation and started hoofing the over one and a half miles to my humble abode. Videos #3 and 4 brings my epic journey to a close. Odysseus had nothing on me. A man-eating Cyclops? Bah!!! Amateurish. Try walking the mean streets of the Bronx at 6am with the wind whipping snow and ice from every conceivable direction. That my friends is EPIC!!!!!! LOL.





Anyway, have a laugh at my adventures. I know I can now especially since I'm writing this while on the train heading back down to work after having walked another mile since the buses STILL aren't running and I am anticipating another mile walk home at around 5am. Thanks to the lord for giving me the strong legs and the strength that I use to plow my way through the snow. Until my next adventure folks. Stay tuned

FH

Bus Rant

Been a while since I've ranted on something appropriate of a rant. Here goes. It must be a Bronx thing. This whole idea by people of varied ages that they are ENTITLED to just go on the bus through the back doors without paying. At first I thought it was young people who were mainly doing it but as of late, age has not played a role in it. I've seen both men and women of different ages sneak on the bus, thereby not paying their fare.

Now I know some will say that the MTA deserves it because they raised the fare and will do so again in the near future. But you know who gets screwed in the end? Us, those of us who pay our fare each and every time. What happened to responsibility. What happened to people doing the right thing. People just want to get theirs and the hell with everyone else. To make matters worse, there are people who insist on sneaking on first before letting those passengers that are getting off the bus, off the bus. And as with what happened to me, you say something and they get mad at you. I've had to get loud with people to let me get off of the bus with my kids without having to navigate through those who chose to sneak on through the back. Really now, is that where we are as a society?

As it is, I see that the fine for not paying your fare has gone up to $100 dollars. What's next, undercover cops riding the buses to catch people not paying their fare to levy the fines? It's not like the cops don't have more important things to do. But if it means less and less freeloaders abusing both us and the system, why not. I give credit to those bus drivers who stand up to those who sneak on the bus. On more than one occasion, I've seen a driver either stop the bus until the fare beater got off of the bus or continue on his route, flag down an officer and report the fare jumper. The person is removed from the bus and I assume given a ticket (Hopefully). Like some bus drivers have said, if you don't have the fare ask to get on, the driver will most times let you on.

It sucks that I, as a fare paying member of society, has to take a back seat to some punk ass person who isn't man or woman enough to put their two bucks back into the system. It's truly time to get the hell out of Dodge.

Later
FHJ