Trying to Hook Up While on the Bus

After my excursion to the Bronx Zoo, I catch the Bx39 to go home. The bus was unusually full and after making my way to the back, I walk into the motions of a modern day Don Juan trying to hook up with a young lady. Here is how it went.

The dude started yapping away that he could guess her age. Bad enough he tried that tact, which by the way never leads to anything positive, he was way off on her age. About 10 years too many. He said she was 30 when she was actually 20. Figuring the young lady would like an older man, he told her he was 32. He actually looked closer to 40. I can say that since I check ID's and I have a better sense of guessing ages. But I digress. She told him that she wasn't interested in dating an older guy and he continue to persist dropping the line "Age doesn't matter" and "It's only a number". Each time she heard a line, she'd roll her eyes in my direction. I just tried my hardest not to laugh. He was oblivious at the fact that she was not interested.

I'll give it to him, as dead as a doorknob as he was he just kept on going. He told her that he wanted to get to know her better and to prove that he was sincere, she could ask him anything she wanted. The girl was trying to be polite but a sly smile came across her face. This woman may have been young but she knew what she was doing.

First she asked him if he had kids. He stalled then answered yes. She shot back she's not interesting in being involved with someone that has kids.

Secondly she asked him if he had a job which he answered "Does that matter?". Nope, no job she says. LOL. He responds by saying "Why do I need a job to rap to a female." The balls on this guy. She told him that she won't waste any time with a person who doesn't have a job or isn't interesting in bettering themselves. Bravo!!!!!

Third, she asked if he was involved with anyone and he responded that he just broke up badly. She flips it around and asks him "How do you know you're ready for another relationship of your last one just ended badly" LOL. The dude just stood there not knowing what to say next. Boom!!!! He was flabbergasted as she got up and exited the bus.

Pilot to bombardier, pilot to bombardier, I'm hit..I'm hit...I'm going down...may-day, may-day...The dude crashed burned. Hahahahahaha.

FH