On My Way Home From Work

So after working a seven day in a row stretch, here's a few highlights of my ride home:

- The token booth clerk at the Uptown Bleecker Street Station is in apparent need for a potty break. So as he's walking towards the bathroom door, he lights up a smoke and proceeds to smoke it before going in. Hey, I understand sometimes you need a smoke before using the can but as far as I know its illegal to smoke on MTA property. Why can someone who pays get busted but an employee not. And this would be the same guy to yell out "Pay Your Fare" at someone hopping the turnstile. Smells hypocritical to me. Just saying.

- There's a drunk and hungry dude who stumbles on to the train. Why do I think he's hungry? He's holding onto an open can of Dinty Moore Beef Stew and eating the contents can to mouth. Apparently there are no utensils required with this meal. To make matters worse, his upper lip and chin were red from the can hitting his face with every bump the train made. At least his tummy was full. Yummo!!!

- There's a family that gets on the train on 125th Street with two kids and a baby. I know its 5:00am, maybe they had somewhere to go. So the baby starts letting out the kind of screams that Jamie Lee Curtis was known for in the late 1970's horror flicks. Hey, I had kids. I know when they are that age they cry. Its how they communicate. I personally didn't mind since I had my headphones on, but the other riders, especially those who were sleeping might have something different to say. But I digress.

So the kid is letting it rip and the parents are scrambling to prepare a bottle of formula. Mom is holding the baby and gives dad a bottle to rinse out. Mind you we're on the 6 train. Dad takes a Coke bottle with water and transfers some to the empty baby bottle to clean it out. He rinses it a bit and empties the contents on the platform.

Ok, cool. But apparently the bottle wasn't clean enough. So he decides to do it again. This time it seems that he's trying to time his dumping of the water with the closing of the train doors. He mis-times the empting of the bottle and instead of dumping the water on the platform, it hits the now closed door causing a wet mess on the floor and on the sleeping person on the other side of the door. Finally he makes the formula and the kid eats and goes to sleep.

- As I'm walking towards the bus stop near Parkchester, this person is walking my way wearing a pink dress. I'm assuming that its a woman (though I can't tell from their looks). So let's use "She" for a lack of a better term. She is looking for empty bottles and can. Hey, doing her part for the environment. That's cool. But that's not why she catches my eye. As we cross paths, I notice that she is well endowed with a large bosom and a pair of the biggest and hardest nipples that I have ever seen on anyone that is dressed. I mean these were protruding to the point that I had to do a double take along with the other people walking in my direction. If those missles were that noticble when she's dressed, she'd poke an eye or two out when she would remove her bra. Again, Just saying.

And with that, I am almost home. Can anything else happen? LOL.

FH